PUNJABI WEDDING

Punjabi wedding traditions and ceremonies are traditionally conducted in Punjabi and are a strong reflection of Punjabi culture. The Punjabi wedding has many rituals and ceremonies that have evolved since traditional times, including many famous Punjabi dances.

                               




Pre Wedding Rituals 

In this ceremony, the boy and the girl commit to enter a wedlock, and won't consider any more matrimonial proposals. Ardaas is done, followed by exchange of gifts.

Rokka (Pre engagement)

 It is an unofficial engagement ceremony where the boy's family and friends come give presents, money and blessings to the bride to be. The girl's mama ji (mother's brother) gives her the nath (nose ring) which she will wear on her wedding. The origin of this ceremony lies in the arranged marriage norm where the parents would let out the world that they are looking for a suitable match for their son or daughter. And once they had found that match, their search had come to an end. Though rings are not exchanged, the couple stand unofficially engaged after this ceremony. Looking forward to starting the wedding ceremonies.

Shagun

 The engagement is usually very high profile. The girls side of the family goes to the boys' side with gifts, jewellery, and other goods, to confirm the engagement.

Sagai

 The wedding celebrations begin with the tikka ceremony, held a week to ten days before the wedding (depending on the number of functions to follow) in which the family of the girl visits that of the boy's carrying beautifully wrapped gifts and the tikka material: a silver tray with a few grains of rice and saffron in a tiny silver bowl, 14 chuharey (dried dates) covered with silver foil and a coconut wrapped in a gold leaf. The father of the girl applies 'tikka' on his son-in-law's forehead and gives him his blessings and some money. In return, the girl's family receives baskets of seven dried fruits: almonds, cashewnuts, chuahara, coconut pieces, raisins, khurman (dried apricots) and phoolmakhana, at the kudmai (sagai or engagement). Nowadays the tikka ceremony is usually combined with the engagement. First, the girl is draped with a chunni (stole), which is usually very ornate. In some families this chunni is a family heirloom, passed down from generation to generation. She is also presented with jewellery, which her mother and sister-in-law help her wear. A tiny dot of mehendi is applied to her palm for good luck, and the function is sealed with the exchange of rings. Everyone present congratulates the couple by feeding them sweet.

Dholki/Sangeet

          

                                                                            

 Can be one day or many days, usually high profile in a banquet hall, ladies sing traditional songs, and it is the eastern version of the western bridal shower. There is a sangeet function hosted by the girl's family, in which just a few close members of the boy's family are invited. The girl's family play the dholki (an elongated tabla) sing songs in which they tease the boy and his family. Nowadays people hire DJs and have a dance party followed by dinner. Ladies sangeet-is held for the bride and her bridesmaids.

Mehendi

                                               

The last major function before the wedding is the mehendi. Mehendiwallis are called to the respective houses of the boy and girl and they apply mehendi to the palms of the female family members, and the hands and feet of the bride. A basket containing bindis and bangles is handed around so girls can choose those that match the outfit they plan to wear to the wedding. The Mehandi ceremony takes place in the atmosphere of a party. The bride and other ladies get mehndii (hennadesigns) done, on their hands and feet (most ladies get it done only on their hands but the bride gets it done on both hands and feet). For the bride the mehndi is sent by the future Mother in Law, which is beautiful decorated.

Rituals at Bride's home

Chuda 

 On the wedding day the rituals at the girl’s home begin with the Chuda ceremony. The oldest maternal uncle and aunt play an important role in the performance of the ceremony. Chuda is basically a set of red and cream ivory bangles that is touched by all present which is gifted by girl's Mamma (mother's Brother) the girl does not see the chuda until she is ready for the marriage. People touch the chuda and give their heartiest wishes to the girl for her future married life. Also, they sprinkle flower petals on the bride. After that, the girl’s uncle, aunt, friends and cousins tie kaliras (silver, gold or gold plated traditional ornaments) to a bangle worn by the girl.

Haldi

Vatna involves applying the paste made from turmeric powder and mustard oil all over the girl’s body by her female friends and relatives. This is done to make the girl look more beautiful on the special day of our life. This ritual demands that the bride to stay at home in her old clothes for a couple of days before her wedding. Ubtan is supposed to bring glow on the bride's and groom's body especially their face. This tradition is also known as Shaint in some cultures. After this ritual, bride and groom are constrained from meeting each other until the wedding ceremony.

Ghara Gharoli

The decorated pitcher of water (ghadoli) is brought for the bride's bath by the groom's bhabi (brother's wife). In the Ghara Gharoli ritual, the bride’s sibling or sibling’s spouse visits the nearby temple and fills a pitcher with holy water. The girl is then bathed with this holy water. Thereafter, the bride wears their wedding attire.The ghara gharoli and the vatna ceremonies take place at the groom’s house too. But over there, the boy’s sister-in-law brings the pitcher of water. As per the tradition, their wedding dress is presented to them by their respective maternal uncles.

                              

Jago ceremony

Jago is a part of a Punjabi marriage ceremony. It is used to welcome the bride to her husband's home. The Jago ceremony takes place the day before the wedding on the mehndi night or sangeet night. The jago is a bright, decorated, colorful steel jug that has candles in it. During the ceremony the groom's family would arrive at the father's house carrying the jagos on their head, singing giddha songs, and dancing. This is supposed to announce their arrival in the loudest and biggest way.

                                               

Rituals at Groom's home

Sarbala

A young nephew or cousin also dons similar attire as the groom. He is called the sarbala/shabbala (caretaker of the groom) and accompanies him.

Sehrabandi

 The groom’s sister ties the sehra and the kalgi on the groom’s turban. After the completion of Sehrabandi ceremony, all those who witness the function give gifts and cash to the boy as a token of good luck.

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Ghodi Chadna

The Ghori Chadna is the final ceremony at the groom’s place. The groom’s sisters and cousins feed and adorn his mare.To ward of the evil eye, people use cash and the groom's bhabhi puts surma in his eyes. The cash is distributed amongst the poor.The groom's nephew or small brother sits with him on the horse.

Barat

usually the barat is in afternoon but some people celebrate it in the evening time too. Barat is welcomed by the bride's family at the Gurudwara. The gyaniji (saint) does Ardaas after the welcome.

       

Rituals at the Gurudwara

Milni

 It literally means "Introductions". The Ardas is performed by the priest (Giani) followed by the formal introductions of the main male players in the families. For example both eldest Chachas (father's younger brother) will come together and exchange garlands of flowers and money. In the Milni ceremony, the girl's relatives give Shagun (a token of good luck) to the groom's close relatives. It is done in the descending order, beginning from the elder most. Cash and clothes are gifted.

               

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Jaimala

After Milni, the bride and groom come in the middle of the circle where the family is standing, and place a heavily made garland made of flowers- varmala on each other to state, they accept each other and will love and live together with one and other. Friends and relatives of the bride and groom indulge in teasing and fun, to celebrate this happy occasion. An auspicious time or muhurat is chosen for the performance of wedding ceremony.

Anand Karaj

 Anand Karaj is the Sikh marriage ceremony, meaning "Blissful Union" or "Joyful Union", that was introduced by Guru Amar Das. The four Lavan (marriage hymns which take place during the marriage ceremony) were composed by his successor, Guru Ram Das. It was originally legalised in India through the passage of the Anand Marriage Act 1909 but is now governed by the Sikh Reht Maryada (Sikh code of conduct and conventions) that was issued by the Shiromani Gurdwara Prabandhak Committee (SGPC).

In a recent verdict of the Sri Akaal Takht Sahib,i.e. a Hukumnama, Anand Karaj can only take place in a Gurudwara. Any Amritdhari (Baptized) Sikh may perform the marriage ceremony.

The history of Anand marriage ceremony is traced back to the time of GURU Amar Das (1479–1574), who composed the long 40-stanza hymn Anand, in the Ramkali measure, suitable to be sung or recited on all occasions of religious importance. His successor, Guru Ram Das, composed a four-stanza hymn, Lavan, which is recited and sung to solemnize nuptials. During the time of Maharaja Ranjit Singh and his successors, however, this ceremony fell into partial disuse under renewed Brahmanical influence at court as well as in society.

The Namdhari reform movement of the mid-19th century made the practice of Anand ceremony a vital plank in its programme as did the later, more widely influential Singh Sabha. But there was opposition from the Arya Samajis and Brahman priestly classes, the former anxious to prove that the Sikhs were but a sect of the Hindus and hence subject to Hindu Law, and the latter apprehensive of a reduction in their clientele and income. The Sikh form of wedding ceremonial eventually received legal sanction through the Anand Marriage Act which was adopted in 1909.

The core of the AnandKaraj(the 'Blissful ceremony') is the 'Lavan', wherein shabads are sung with the bride and groom circumambulating the Guru Granth Sahib. The ceremony serves to provide the foundational principles towards a successful marriage and also places the marriage within the context of unity with God. Guru Ram Das Ji, composed the four stanzas, Lavan to be sung and recited as the core of the Anand Karaj.^[5] In 1579, the fifth Guru, Guru Arjan Dev Ji and Mata Ganga were the first couple to be married through the Anand Karaj ceremony

The ceremony is now universally observed by the Sikhs.

Doli

Doli marks the departure of the bride from her parental house. As a custom, the bride throws phulian or puffed rice over her head. The ritual conveys her good wishes for her parents. A traditionally sad ritual, here the bride says goodbye to her parents, siblings and rest of her family. Her brothers/male cousins then lead her to her husband, who waits to take her to his family home to begin her new life as a married woman. Her relatives throw coins in the wake of this procession. In keeping with tradition the mother in-law will often not come to the Doli and instead make preparations at home to greet the arrival of her son and new wife. The mother-in-law has a glass of water in her hand, which she circles 3 times around her bahu and then offers it to her to drink, as a symbol of her acceptance and blessing as her newest daughter.